ONCE you are over 35 hangovers become a bleak psychological prison of paranoia and depression, it has been confirmed.
A MAN is really feeling the benefits of his exercise regime when he is not recovering from agonising injuries, he has announced.
BEING an idiot is the most effective method for avoiding anxiety, research has found.
A SMOKER has expressed concern after finding a hair in rolling tobacco that already contained embalming fluid.
PARENTS have reacted to school summer holidays being cut to five weeks with an outpouring of feigned sympathy.
DIET experts are exploring a new theory that an inbuilt sense called ‘hunger’ may somehow indicate how much food we should consume.
A PIONEERING penis transplant may be the first time the male organ has actually helped someone, it has been claimed.
A WOMAN has given up her bid to look good on a one-week holiday in favour of a summer full of drink and bacon, it has emerged.
BREAKFAST is the least important meal of the day, it has been confirmed.
THE makers of Corsodyl mouthwash have defended a new advert in which a woman’s teeth come to life and murder her.
WHEN British people celebrate things they usually end up in hospital, it has been confirmed.
EATING avocados is only possible by visualising a delicious sausage, it has been claimed.