What if they become friends? asks terrified world

International

BRITONS have responded to the worrying rise of the far-right in Germany with thoughtful, well-considered Hitler jokes, it has emerged.

KIM Jong-un and his North Korean regime have been completely disarmed by his friendly new nickname of ‘Rocket Man’, it has emerged.

BORIS Johnson has flown to the hurricane disaster zone to dangle from the last remaining electricity cable under British control in the Caribbean.

NIGEL Farage is to speak at the rally of a far-right German party, just like he dreamed of doing when he was a boy at school.

KIM Jong-un is not really sure what his nuclear weapons programme is meant to achieve, he has admitted.

THE UK has suggested the EU skip this whole bill business and go straight to the part where we get everything we want.

KIM JONG-UN desperately wants to be Donald Trump who yearns to be Vladimir Putin, psychologists have agreed.

DONALD Trump has claimed that there are bad factions on both sides of the hurricane that hit America this weekend.

THERE will be a darkness cloaking America for at least the next three years, it has emerged.

DAVID Davis has turned up to latest round of EU negotiations with a cake that he says he wants to eat but then still have afterwards.

STEVE Bannon called the White House to see if anyone has found a sack containing wild snakes, it has been confirmed.

DONALD Trump is to conduct the rest of 'presidency' while balancing a shotgun across the back of his neck and chewing on a piece of grass.