International
Trump converts to Islam
DONALD Trump has confirmed that he is a now a Muslim.
Assange to return favour by influencing Swedish election
JULIAN Assange has promised to thank Sweden for dropping charges against him by boosting far-right parties at their next election.
Trump revealed nuclear code is UR-FIRED
PRESIDENT Trump has revealed that the launch code to America's nuclear arsenal is also his television catchphrase.
This Russia thing completely separate from other Russia thing, says White House
THE White House has clarified that the new scandal about Russia is completely unconnected with its previous, different, Russian scandal.
Trump convinced this is actually clever
DONALD Trump believes that firing the man investigating his collusion with Russia is a really clever solution to the whole problem, he has confirmed.
Huge relief after only 11 million people vote for a fascist
THERE was huge relief today after just 11 million people in Europe’s second biggest country voted for a neo-Nazi crackpot.
We don’t give a shit who wins your pathetic bunfight, EU tells Britain
THE European Union has strongly denied Theresa May’s claim that the UK’s election is important enough for it to give half a shit about.
EU strangely not begging Britain for mercy
EUROPEAN leaders do not seem to realise the EU will collapse when Britain leaves, puzzled Britons have observed.
EU dares to have Brexit demands
THE EU has dared to have a list of demands for the Brexit negotiations when it is Britain that will be doing the demanding.
Idiotic multi-billionaire assumes Tories care about foreigners
AN idiotic American billionaire has assumed the Tories care about the fate of people in the developing world.
Daily Mail ordered to pay damages to anyone who has ever read it
THE Daily Mail has been ordered to pay damages to readers for exposing them to decades of demented tripe.
Ryanair passenger hopeful he might get aggressively dragged off
A CRAMPED, overheating man would not mind being forcibly bundled off his Ryanair flight.