WITH a dwindling navy, the UK will protect its interests abroad with our miserable, complaining attitude, the government has announced.
THE UK’s ambassador to the USA is going to be fired for not lying about how great Donald Trump is, but who will replace him?
AS natural choice to become British ambassador because of my famous impartiality, here's what I would have said about the US.
KEEN to be a rude sh*t and humiliate yourself at work, like the Brexit Party’s MEPs did by turning their backs on the EU anthem? Read on!
JAPAN has told the world that it will never understand how fiercely it detests whales or how joyous it feels to be slaughtering them again.
THE NEXT dominant species on the planet is following the news from Iran with growing interest.
AMERICANS have asked Britons to watch the Morgan-Trump interview again, but this time imagine the British idiot is now leading their country.
THE Queen is contemplating abdicating the throne if anyone ever again tries to make her spend three days with President Trump.
A BEARSKIN guard outside Buckingham Palace has admitted struggling to keep a straight face at the preposterous thing on President Trump’s head.
BRITAIN is to spend the next week pleasantly distracted from its ongoing political crisis by watching a touring orange clown.
IT’S rare for Donald Trump to go anywhere without being a dick in some way, so what has he got planned for his stay in Britain?
WITH a thriving economy backed by its own currency, Legoland is to leave Britain and apply for EU membership.