Mashing stuff down plughole ‘probably fine’, say experts

FORCING things down the plughole is unlikely to have bad consequences, according to boffins who cannot be arsed to walk to the bin.

An intensive six-month research project by the Institute for Studies found that while putting waste matter in the bin is the right thing to do, it is also boring and yucky.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “Our studies have led us to the conclusion that forcing a bit of wet beef down the sink isn’t the end of the world.

“Ramming potato peelings, wet bread and bits of cereal down the hole can’t do that much harm, can it? That’s just rigorous science.

“Also no one really knows what’s underneath the plughole anyway. Who’s to say it’s not a special bin for leftover pasta?”

However a rival team at the University of Helsinki has made the controversial claim that the sink will eventually become blocked with rotting matter that is “mega-stinky”.