The idiot's guide to changing your name

WANT to change your name? Perhaps you’re on the run or just tired of being called Leslie Smallcock? Here’s how to do it without sounding like a tw*t.

Idiots at outdoor cinema shiver through film they’ve seen before

Film fans at an outdoor cinema event insisted they had a great time shivering through a film they have all seen several times before.

The toddler's guide to being taken to a music festival

IT may feel as if your parents are trying to traumatise or actually kill you by taking you to a music festival, but they are just idiots. Here's how to avoid being mentally scarred for life.

How to pretend today's torrential rain isn't ruining your British holiday

PARTS of Britain will today get a month’s rain in a day, but how will you claim it isn’t making your British break a nightmare? Try these tips.

Couple inviting people to wedding evening do admit they're just padding

A COUPLE inviting people to only the evening bit of their wedding have revealed they just want the place to look busy.

Last remaining mouse mat expected to fetch up to 80p at Sotheby's

THE WORLD’S last remaining mouse mat will be put up for auction this week, with experts predicting a sale price of up to 80 pence.

Woman spends entire holiday photographing her legs in front of some water

A WOMAN has spent an entire holiday taking pictures of 'views' that just happen to be behind her tanned legs.

‘Fun run’ pretty f**king light on fun

A LOCAL fun run has been slammed for being mainly just running.

Pack of cards only thing holding family holiday together

A PACK of cards is the only thing holding a family holiday together, it has been confirmed.

The middle class guide to ruining a picnic

A PICNIC is the perfect meal: finger food with booze and hardly any washing up. But thankfully middle class people have found ways to complicate it. Here's how to ruin your next one.

Woman one item of clothing away from being fully dressed as a leopard

A WOMAN on a night out is one item of leopard print away from being confused with a jungle cat using its hind legs to walk.  

Cornwall was great, says liar

A MAN who claimed his family holiday in Cornwall was great is obviously lying, it has been confirmed.