A MAN has refused to compromise his masculinity by driving his wife’s Fiat 500, he has confirmed.
A FULLY-GROWN man still loves big trucks and is having a difficult time hiding it.
A SURVEY has revealed the worst places to live in England, with London excluded from the results because otherwise it would be nothing but.
BRITAIN’S middle class families are telling everyone about their smug and aspirational New Year’s resolutions.
A 29-YEAR-OLD woman who loathes children insists she is not going to have any purely to protect the environment.
A BOURGEOIS family is desperate for it to start snowing so they can show off their vintage wooden sleigh.
A SEEMINGLY normal couple have confirmed they are actually going to midnight mass.
ARE you planning to give presents that clearly required no thought or effort to people you don’t really care about?
A FAMILY heading to Bali for Christmas have admitted that they will still have a horrible time resenting each other despite the sun.
HIPSTERS who are still wearing shoes without socks have been told to pack it in because it is winter and they look like twats.
A GROUP of deluded halfwits still believes, with a week to go until Christmas Day, that they will all find time to meet beforehand.
A COUNCIL house absolutely festooned in flashing Christmas decorations is goading passers-by into voicing prejudiced thoughts.