The five questions you actually want to ask on your video calls

STUCK asking about the health of your friends’ elderly parents at Zoom o’clock? Here are the questions you really want to ask.

What shit are you buying to cheer yourself up?

BORED of all this? Go online and buy yourself a morale-boosting treat that you won’t want by the time it arrives. But what?

Should you book a cruise or read the news?

IN the current crisis, it is hard to know whether to book a holiday, or to do a minuscule amount of research into quite how up shit creek the world is at the moment. Here's how to decide.  

Mum struggling to recreate high she used to get from dropping off children at school

A WOMAN is missing the kick she used to feel when leaving her children in someone else’s care for the day.

Man goes on disappointing summer holiday to his childhood memories

A MIDDLE aged man has managed to go on a disappointing summer holiday during lockdown by revisiting his childhood memories.

Five annoying activities that shouldn't be reintroduced after lockdown

TEDIOUS supposedly-distanced trips out are now allowed after months of lockdown, but what irritating pastimes could we quietly do away with while we have the chance?

The middle class family's guide to why the crisis is worse for them

ARE you a self-obsessed middle class family? Here’s how to let everyone know that the coronavirus crisis has been worse for you than anyone else.

How to recreate the summer holiday you won't be going on in your own home

IS your week in Menorca knocking back cocktails and snoozing on a sun-lounger then spending hungover evenings shivering with sun-stroke cancelled? Do it at home:

How to stay safe on public transport, by a Tory who has never been on a bus

HAVE you made such poor life choices that you have to use public transport? Junior minister and multi-millionaire Denys Finch Hatton has some common-sense advice.

Parents realise son planning to keep living with them after lockdown

THE parents of a 29-year-old man who moved back home for lockdown have realised he has no plans to move out after lockdown.

Can we go on holiday? and four other Guardian reader concerns

WORRIED your pampered liberal lifestyle won’t survive the pandemic? What are the questions sending your anxiety through the roof?

Woman who's stopped contouring face forced to admit she's 2D

A WOMAN'S make up-free lockdown regime has revealed that her previous facial contouring efforts were the only reason she appeared to have three dimensions.