News

Daily walks are boring as shit, admit Britons

PEOPLE in Britain have admitted that their daily walks are really f**king boring now.

Everyday things now massive pain in the arse

TINY things are now a giant faff, Britons have realised as lockdown begins to ease.

Man discovered alive after five years off social media

A MAN presumed to be dead after losing interest in social media in 2015 has been discovered alive and well and living in Colchester.

Mum drops off kids 72 hours early for reopening of school

A DILIGENT mother-of-two has left her children at the school gates a full three days before their new term starts on Monday.

UK running out of ways to f**k this up

BRITAIN is quickly running out of ways to f**k up its handling of the coronavirus, according to experts.

Six things to do with exactly six friends

NOW that we’re allowed to meet in groups of six, you’re probably wondering - what can I do with exactly five other people? Here are some excellent suggestions.

Men happy to avoid talking to barbers

MEN are continuing to enjoy not having to make small talk with their barbers on a monthly basis.

Five things your partner's distant stare could mean

DOES your partner stare into the distance and say they’re fine, but in a worrying way? Here are five things that could be causing it. 

Teeth an endless, expensive ball-ache

MAINTAINING a healthy set of teeth is a painful lifelong struggle that will leave you massively out-of-pocket, it has emerged.

Man washing car a disturbing number of times

A MAN’S neighbour has been washing his Ford Galaxy a frankly distressing amount of times, it has emerged.

The new coronavirus rules for us and them explained

DESPITE the UK’s coronavirus rules changing next week, it seems likely that some people won’t have to stick to them. Here we explain the new two-tier system.

Your guide to making eye contact during coronavirus

EYE contact is hard to get right at the best of times, but with people wearing masks it’s trickier than ever. Here’s how to not look creepy or mental.