News

The six properties you'll be horrified by when looking for a houseshare

LOOKING for a new place? Can’t afford blissful isolation? Then you’ll be recoiling in horror at what other people call home.

Woman realises her boyfriend is punching above his weight

A WOMAN has belatedly realised that she is way out of her boyfriend’s league.

Five things more romantic than buying a crappy Valentine's card from a garage

IF THE unspontaneous purchase of an overpriced Valentine’s card from the nearest convenient shop isn’t for you, try these ways of showing your partner you love them.

Adorable Brummie thinks he's going to be a yuppie

A BIRMINGHAM man has amused his family and friends by telling them he will use HS2 to get a well-paid job in London.

Have you gone from joking about the coronavirus to quietly sh*tting yourself?

HAVE you gone from ridiculing media scare stories about the coronavirus to panicking that you’re going to die? Hide your fear with these tips.

I just wanted my own TV show, admits Greta Thunberg

CLIMATE activist Greta Thunberg has confirmed that starring in her own reality TV show was the entire point from the start.

Are you enough of a twat to become Instagram famous?

ARE you prepared to spend time and money doing stupid bullsh*t so strangers will click Like and Follow?

Man achieves perfect work-life balance by quitting job

A MAN has achieved the perfect balance between his personal life and professional duties by quitting the latter entirely.

Fully-grown adults sign birthday card from dog

A MARRIED couple in their thirties have written their dog’s name in childlike writing in a friend’s birthday card and drawn a paw print next to it.

23 Mars missions, and what else £100 billion could buy you instead of HS2

THE HS2 line linking London and Birmingham, which are already linked, is currently set to cost £100bn. What else could that money buy?

Snow preventing office workers typing on computer keyboard in heated office

AN unexpected snowfall has made it impossible for staff at an insurance firm to operate their computers.

Some dick going down high street in canoe

SOME twat is making a mockery of the flooded high street by going down it in a canoe, locals have confirmed.