News

Woman 'flaunting' her baby bump by not wearing circus big top

A WOMAN who is wearing clothes that allow people to see she is pregnant is just flaunting herself, it has been claimed.

'We got through the war and we'll get through this' says plumber born in 1977

A MAN born more than three decades after the Second World War is acting like he flew Spitfires against the Luftwaffe.

Dinner guests pretending they can't smell litter tray

GUESTS at a dinner party are pretending they cannot smell the litter tray stench in the house.

Delighted supply teacher gets the 'colouring-in class' again

A SUPPLY teacher is pleased to have been assigned to a class of 13-year-old low-achievers for whom colouring-in is still considered a valid lesson.

I regret to inform British businesses that it is necessary for us to go mad

AS BUSINESS secretary of the current Conservative government, I have made assurances to companies operating within the UK that we will operate in their best interests.

Middle-aged man with hefty boobs still calling them 'pecs'

A MIDDLE aged man still believes his manboobs are just well-developed pectoral muscles.

Ryanair 'a totally acceptable casualty of Brexit'

MOST people would be prepared to live in abject poverty if it was guaranteed that Ryanair would go down with them, it has emerged.

Couple on date night can't wait to get home, jump into bed and get on their phones

A COUPLE on date night cannot wait to finish their meal, get home, go straight up to the bedroom and have a good, long phone browsing session.