News

Six people you're not allowed to find attractive

ALL'S fair in love and war, right? No. Because if you fancy the wrong person you are a terrible individual or even a pervert. So under no circumstances fancy these people.

The five best household chores to do so your partner gets the shit ones

WANT to skive off household chores? Do these just-about-tolerable ones to show you’re doing your bit while your partner gets stuck with properly shit tasks.

Six reasons why we must never 'find the new Oasis'

PEOPLE have complained that the 20-something generation has failed to produce an Oasis-style Britpop sensation. Here’s why that’s the last thing the world needs.

Do you need an SUV or do you live in Kensington?

ARE your days spent driving up mountains while dragging a horsebox, or do you want a car so needlessly big your spoilt kids can’t kick the back of your seat? Find out with this quiz.

Things you won't see in the Buckingham Palace gardens you wish you could

IF you visit the gardens of Buckingham Palace this summer, is it too much to ask to see a live rerun of It’s A Royal Knockout? Here’s what you should be able to look at.

Five huge crazes of the 80s that were dreadful bollocks

EVERY decade has its crazes, but the 1980s featured some particularly strange ones. Take a trip down memory lane to a weird time when adults wore deely boppers.

Do you give a shit what f**king vaccine you get? Take our quiz

THE Welsh are getting the Moderna jab while under-30s are advised not to get the AstraZeneca jab. Do you care at this point or would you take anything? Find out with our quiz.

'F**k it, let's all go indoors': the five new ways to know you're too pissed

UNSURE how to spot you’ve had one too many now you can’t get kicked out of the pub for vomiting in a pint glass? Here are the tell-tale signs in the age of Covid.

Want to feel old? Here's what you look like now

CURIOUS to see what the relentless passage of time looks like? Pick up a mirror and pay attention...

Sadiq Khan's guide to a legal weed London

I’M SADIQ Khan, the Mayor of London who’s proposed decriminalising cannabis to piss Boris off. Come with me on a journey around my legal weed capital.

Six popular song lyrics that are batshit crazy in retrospect

MUSIC fan? Ever listened to the lyrics of a song you love and thought ‘wait – what the f**k’? These songs are, on close attention, completely deranged...

How to pathetically prove you're cleverer than everyone else

DO you feel the constant need to prove your intellectual superiority? Here’s how to do it, as you’re not smart enough to work it out for yourself.