News

Idiot believes life will be hard for Harry now

AN idiot has convinced himself that life will be difficult for the Duke of Sussex from this point on. 

Woman who hasn't undone hair bun in four days about to learn a lesson

A 30 YEAR-OLD woman is about to learn a harsh lesson after failing to undo her hair bun for four days.

Is your partner better than a gay penguin? Take the quiz...

GAY penguins are fantastic, but before you leave your spouse for the comfort of one of these Antarctic sex-symbols, why not take our quiz to see if you’re making the right decision.

Woman cheating on KeepCup with filthy paper gigolos

A WOMAN who left her reusable flask at home has been coming in late from work with brown lips and stinking of pumpkin spiced latte.

There will never be a ginger Bond, confirm producers

PRODUCERS of the James Bond franchise have confirmed that there will never be a ginger Bond for as long as they have any say in the matter.

Scientists discover fourth takeaway option

SCIENTISTS have announced the discovery of a fourth takeaway option that is neither Chinese, Indian and pizza.

Couple decide to live together before breaking up

A COUPLE have chosen to move in together before taking the next step of breaking up.

How to still be a sanctimonious vegan now you can eat sh*te from KFC like everyone else

NOW KFC, Greggs and Burger King all sell plant-based products, vegans are at risk of not being as special. Here’s how to stay strong.

Traffic pulls over to let ambulance and BMW driver pass, thinks BMW driver

A BMW driver is pretty confident that traffic that pulled over to let an ambulance pass also wanted his progress to be unimpeded.

Woman with 37 tops packed for overnight trip adds a 38th

A WOMAN who has packed 37 different choices of top for an overnight stay in a hotel has added one more, just in case.

Is your body a temple or a dodgy kebab shop?

DO you treat your body like a beautiful temple or stuff it full of questionable meat and grease? See where you fall on the scale.

Man unable to stop watching TV show he hates

A MAN who has grown to hate a TV show refuses to miss a single episode, it has emerged.