Flat earth conspiracy theorists now claiming there is a 'female orgasm'

CONSPIRACY theorists that believe the earth is flat and 9-11 was an inside job are now claiming that there is such a thing as a ‘female orgasm’.

Mum never thought she'd be so desperate to visit a soft play centre

A WOMAN who has entertained her children in her own home for four months would give anything to ignore them in a soft play centre for two hours.

Escape from Leicester – have you got what it takes? Play our game

LEICESTER is no longer a city – it is a prison. But have you got what it takes to make it out?

Tenner that's been in wallet since March not sure what the f**k is going on

A £10 note that has been in a man’s wallet since March this year is wondering what the f**k is going on out there.

'Thin jeans' armistice to be held when lockdown lifts

BRITONS are being urged to hand over  jeans they can no longer fit into after spending lockdown eating constantly and barely moving.

Six incredibly basic things you've forgotten how to do during lockdown

AS restrictions are lifted, the terrifying prospect of returning to normal gets ever more real. Here are some simple things you’ve probably forgotten how to do forever.

Is this Britain or Hell? Take our quiz

IT’S unbearably hot, anything you do might kill you and a malevolent clown is gambling with your life and future. Is it Britain or Hell? Find out with our fun quiz.

White Lives Matter supporter has zero examples of what the f**k he's on about

A MAN asked to explain what the phrase ‘white lives matter’ means was unable to give any explanation that was not bullshit. 

Britain's problem is it's full of twats, say experts

FROM useless wanker politicians to the f**kwitted man-in-the-street the UK’s main problem is that it is full of twats, research has found.

Your souvenir Victory Over Coronavirus article

REJOICE! Plucky Britain has defeated coronavirus and our victory celebrations may begin. Print out and frame this historic article as a souvenir of our second-finest hour.

Should I let a working class person into my social bubble?

WORRIED about lowering the tone of your social bubble? Waitrose shopper Charlotte Phelps explains how to get the perfect mix.

Chumbawamba statue back up again

A STATUE of left-wing band Chumbawumba pulled down last week is already back up again, it has emerged.