Society

How to have a brilliant DIY funeral

MORE and more people are choosing ‘DIY’ funerals which are cheap but just as much fun as proper ones. Read our guide to burying yourself or loved ones on a budget.

'Generation Sensible' mainly into being sanctimonious little twats in surveys

A NEW generation of young people are rejecting sex, drugs and alcohol in favour of wanking on about their mature lifestyle in surveys.

Man who introduces himself with 'I'm an atheist' not much fun at parties

A MAN who immediately tells people he does not believe in god or organised religion is not a barrel of laughs at social gatherings.

Woman finds herself in fast walking race with person behind her

A WOMAN found herself trying to walk faster than someone behind her for no good reason, it has emerged.

Man thinks not liking things is the same as having a personality

A MAN thinks disliking popular stuff makes him interesting, it has emerged.

Woman whose boyfriend says he likes 'natural look' to stop washing

A WOMAN whose boyfriend claims he likes women who look ‘natural’ is going to stop washing her hair and shaving her toes, she has confirmed.

Non-football fans emerge from underground bunkers

PEOPLE who are not interested in football have emerged from their underground shelters.

Whole carriage overjoyed as man running for train narrowly misses it

PASSENGERS on a train are rejoicing after a man desperately running to catch it failed to do so.