DO you think children should work for their pocket money and do endless part-time jobs for pennies? Here’s how to make them 'independent', or maybe 'psychologically scarred'.
Struggling to make bountiful meals for your kids on a budget of pennies? It’s not that hard, you lazy free school meals scrounger. Here’s how a dickhead on social media whips up feasts for next to nothing.
A SUBURBAN man spends a large amount of time fuming about things he does not agree with which have not actually happened.
HURRAH - it’s half term! Here’s what to do when you’re not allowed to do anything you actually had planned.
A WHOLE generation of teenagers are being deprived of the chance to spend three months pissing about in Southeast Asia and then base their entire personalities on the experience.
ARE you in your mid-40s but still a funky 20-something in your head? Here are some things that will plunge you into an existential panic when you realise how long ago they happened.
SCHOOLS have been told they must not show any left-wing bias when telling the story of Robin Hood.
THE Pope has endorsed same-sex civil partnerships, but bigots will still think of weird reasons to oppose gay marriage. Here are some of them.
A CHILD raised on a carefully-curated diet of educational books, Radio 4 and hand-painted wooden toys is still an idiot, his parents have admitted.
AS retailers unveil their Christmas toy ranges, parents can’t help but seethe with resentment as they remember crap toys like these.
AWARENESS of social injustice is a good thing, but are you trying to prove you’re more 'woke' than everyone else? You could be overdoing it.
A GRANDAD hopes that with his help and guidance, his grandkids can end up as stupid and ill-informed as he is.