ACROSS Britain, people are ranting about the bloody immigrants coming here, becoming doctors, nurses and surgeons, saving us from a pandemic.
Illness, unemployment or reruns of Only Fools and Horses: which worst case scenario are you preparing for?
AS Britain braces itself for the pandemic to continue, fears are growing about just how bad things could get. Here are some worst case scenarios to plan for.
ARE you calling the police to report your neighbour going out twice because you’re a good citizen or to get revenge for their dog shitting on your doorstep in 2008? Take our quiz.
JESUS has rejected claims that this is the worst ever Easter, stating that his original Easter featured a much more savage lockdown.
A WOMAN has been forced to visit A&E after her clapping in support of the NHS led to a fractured wrist.
REMEMBER REMEMBER hugs? How innocent they were? Try getting through these non-sexual examples of physical contact without getting horny.
A COUNTRY that has spent the last three-and-a-half years obsessed with freedom is absolutely fine with being locked up until May.
A HOMESCHOOLED child has realised he is both more intelligent and better educated than his clueless cretin parents.
OLD people have requested bored younger people to please f**k off and leave them alone.
THE UK has agreed that days at this point are taking weeks, and weeks are taking entire f**king years.
HUMANITY has been reminded of what’s truly important by COVID-19. Here’s five lessons we’ll forget the moment it’s gone.
PARENTS have confirmed that juggling working from home and educating young children while never going out is just an absolute f**king joy.