Society

Parents full of sh*t, kids discover

CHILDREN have discovered their parents are total bullshitters who lie to them daily.

The gammon's guide to not having a racist bone in your body

BIGOTED bones are terrible. I had a granddad who suffered. But today’s gammons don’t have a racist bone in them, and here’s why:

Schoolboy writes harrowing true-horror essay about what he did on his sh*t British holiday

A SCHOOLBOY has told the unspeakable truth about his sh*tty British summer holiday in a back-to-school essay.

What advice should you take from Get Ready for Brexit's website?

THE government is preparing the UK for Brexit by putting helpful advice written by a 19-year-old Whitehall intern on a website. Try these tips:

Woman who missed one person out of email thread wishing she was never born

A WOMAN who missed one person out of an email thread is now wishing she had never been born.

Man who solved Facebook puzzle 'may not be in intellectual top two per cent'

A MAN considered to have an elite-level intellect after solving a Facebook word puzzle may be a fraud, it has emerged.

Parents sobbing tears of joy at Back to School display in M&S

A GROUP of parents have been unable to hold back their tears of delight at the Back to School display in a Marks & Spencer.

Couple had table seat to themselves for whole train journey

A COUPLE  had a full table to themselves for a two-hour train journey, it has been confirmed.

Couple in crazed competition to be most patient with kids

A COUPLE are locked in an intense competition over who can be the most patient with their children.

Peaky Blinders now most popular name for baby boys

PEAKY Blinders is now the most popular name for baby boys, with Killing Eve the most popular for girls.

Your guide to living in fascist Britain

HAVE you ever wondered what it would be like if Britain was an undemocratic, fascist state?

Five fun lies to terrify children about to go to secondary school

DO you want to scare the sh*t out of kids about to move from cuddly primary school to the cut throat corridors of secondary? Tell them these classic lies.