Society

Woman becomes self help guru simply by putting every 10th word in all-caps

A WOMAN has become a self help guru after accidentally putting every 10th word she writes in capital letters.

Five utterly pointless debates you can't help getting sucked into

DO you sometimes get drawn into mindless ‘debates’ then bitterly regret wasting your time? Here are some classics to avoid.

A-Level student wins first choice of average university and p*ss-easy course

AN A-Level student is celebrating getting the grades to go to a low-level university and do a course that will mean he can stay in bed most days.

Pedants literally give up over misuse of 'literally'

BRITAIN’S pedants have conceded defeat over persistent misuse of the word ‘literally’.

Little sod demands entire WHSmith stationery section for new school term

A CHILD has told his parents they have to buy him the whole WHSmith stationery section or he will call social services.

All the A-levels bullsh*t you need in one article

IT’S A-level results time again, so prepare for an onslaught of overexcited teenagers and tedious advice. Or just read this article and save yourself loads of time.

Dads confirm now is perfect time to buy a winter coat

DADS have confirmed that now is the perfect time to buy a winter coat as you would probably get it cheap and the arrival of winter is inevitable.

Man who can’t keep a phone screen intact decides to get a dog

A MAN who cannot keep his phone screen intact for more than a month has decided to get a dog.

Freshers working hard on ridiculous personas

TEENAGERS about to start university are developing absurd new personalities in an attempt to seem interesting.

We’re just so busy, say retired parents

A WOMAN has failed to appreciate how 'busy' her retired parents are.

'Popping round' to be made a criminal offence

THE act of ‘popping round’ unannounced to someone’s house is to be reclassified as a crime with the possibility of a custodial sentence.

Mum suspects adorable two-year-old son will grow up into total w*nker

A MOTHER is increasingly convinced her cute toddler will grow up to be an insufferable tosspot as he reaches manhood.