Women Sad About Something, Say Men

WOMEN across Britain seem to be terribly sad about something, men said today.

A minute to a minute and a half should be enough

In homes and offices throughout the country men have noticed women consoling each other and comparing observations about what seems to be a very sad event.

Bill McKay, a man from Peterborough, said: "I'm not exactly sure what it is they're sad about. Has it got something to do with the cricket?

"Come to think of it I haven't noticed all the women being this sad together since, oh, it must be September 1997. They were sad for quite a long time back then. God only knows what that was all about, though it must have been very sad because I remember tripping over flowers everywhere I went for at least a fortnight.

"I suppose I should ask why they're sad but that might involve being sucked into a conversation about the sad thing, and while I don't yet know what that is, I am pretty sure I don't care."

Tom Logan, from Chester, said: "Will being sad about the sad thing get me more sex, or will it make people think I'm gay? It's a very difficult time."

Professsor Henry Brubaker, of the Institute for Studies, stressed that not all the women were sad, especially the ones with attention spans longer than a photo caption.

He added: "There are some women who will not need counselling at a time like this. But only some."

Meanwhile Emma Bradford, a woman from Guildford, said: "It's all so sad. So very, very sad. What else is on?"