War

Redundancy for soldiers who didn't kill anyone

SOLDIERS who failed to meet Afghan death targets are to be sacked.

Idea of female cub scout leader 'is doing Al Qaeda's head in'

JIHADISTS said the idea of a woman being in charge of young males in uniform was driving them crazy.

Horses declare war on humanity

HORSES are now at war with humans.

£45m death machine used for killing people

A MASSIVE helicopter armed with machine guns, missiles and rocket launchers has been used to kill people, it has emerged.

Best Nobel Peace Prize ever

THE Nobel Peace Prize has caused stroke-inducing rage from people who are an absolute joy to watch when they are angry.

Libyans to hunt down Back to the Future Libyans

"They are driving around Hill Valley like a bunch of maniacs."

We kind of assumed you wanted to kill us, army tells Taleban

BRITISH troops have assured the Taleban that the intention to kill them has been perfectly clear for a while.

Harry targeted by Taleban hen parties

PRINCE Harry will be a target for crazy Taleban good-time girls, experts have warned.

MoD unveils surface-to-air cockneys

COCKNEYS will be launched from the top of a tower block if someone attacks the Olympics, it has been confirmed.