Politics

Parliament to tackle sexual harassment with pay rise for MPs

THE best way to stamp out sexual harassment in parliament is to pay MPs more if they promise not to do it, it has been claimed.

Government bidding to be most f**ked-up ever

TORIES are throwing everything behind an attempt to enter the record books as the most f**ked-up British government of all time. 

We teach that Brexit is almost as good as communism, say universities

UNIVERSITIES have confirmed they teach that Brexit is incredibly brilliant but not quite up there with communism. 

Tories to change Universal Credit but only for evil bastard reasons

UNIVERSAL Credit is to be reformed but out of self-interest not human decency, Tories have revealed.

Jacob Rees-Mogg preparing for World War Two

TORY MP Jacob Rees-Mogg believes that despite the prime minister’s attempts to appease Germany, Britain is once again on the verge of World War Two.

Doomsayer ruining Brexit by thinking about it

A SELFISH bastard is putting Britain’s excellent Brexit plan at risk by thinking about the consequences.

Theresa May: ‘I have full support of Cabinet for some bizarre f**king reason’

THERESA May has confirmed the Cabinet agrees she is the best person to be prime minister and that everyone should let that sink in for a minute.  

What about no prime minister, suggests Britain

BRITAIN has given its backing to a radical new plan of replacing Theresa May with nobody at all and leaving the post permanently vacant.