Politics

Nobody honestly thinks Theresa May will ever go

POLITICIANS, the media and the UK public have admitted they cannot truthfully ever imagine Theresa May not being prime minister.

Main parties hit by 'f**king everything' backlash

THE two main parties have lost hundreds of seats due to a backlash against Brexit, austerity, May, Corbyn, Parliament, the economy and everything fucking else.

How to be a twat who lives abroad but still supports Brexit

ARE you a Brit who lives in the EU but still wants a no-deal Brexit? Here’s how to convince yourself it’s a perfectly sensible position.

Poor Tory councillors who have done nothing wrong to be unfairly punished by voters

INNOCENT Conservative councillors are set to be cruelly punished by electors meanly linking them with the actions of the Conservative government.

I should never have trusted a Gavin, says May

THERESA May has admitted the whole defence secretary sacking is her fault because she was foolish enough to trust a Gavin.

'Project Fear' vindicated as Brexit leads to return of Ann Widdecombe

FRESH concerns have been raised over Brexit after it caused the return of Ann Widdecombe.

Working class man reckons someone called 'Annunziata Rees-Mogg' is on his side

A WORKING class man actually believes that someone called Annunziata Rees-Mogg relates to him and has his best interests at heart.

The gammon's guide to coping with Brexit not happening

WITH Brexit looking increasingly unlikely, how can gammons fill the gaping void in their lives? Here devoted Brexiter Roy Hobbs explains his coping strategies.

Julian Assange's Rough Guide to Ecuador

HELLO there. As a full-time resident of Ecuador for the last seven years I know it intimately. Here’s my guide to that small, but beautiful, country.

The Tory MP's guide to being an incredible prick

ARE you a Tory MP who thinks it’s a jolly jape to spout offensive rubbish and generally be an embarrassment? Here’s how to go about it.

May sparks up massive spliff and puts on Buffy box set from start

HAVING secured an extra six months to sort out Brexit, Theresa May is celebrating with a big spliff and a proper rewatch of Buffy.

Facebook reminds man he made 'Brexit? Sounds like a breakfast cereal!' joke three years ago today

FACEBOOK has reminded a despondent man that three years ago, Brexit was such an unfamilar word and concept he tossed off a quick quip about it.