Politics
If you strike me down I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine, claims Corbyn
LABOUR leader Jeremy Corbyn has told Boris Johnson that if he strikes him down, then it is he who will truly have lost.
Corbyn nasty bad man
JEREMY Corbyn is a bad, nasty man so you no vote for him.
What sort of idiot voting against your own interests are you?
ARE you planning to vote for an election candidate whose stated policy is to screw you over? Check to see if you’re one of the following idiots.
Wetherspoons to be given Carlisle if Conservatives win
BORIS Johnson has pledged the city of Carlisle to Wetherspoons to thank boss Tim Martin for his Brexit campaigning.
People who don't give a sh*t about politics having a lovely Christmassy day
THE third of Britain that does not give a sh*t about politics is having a delightful festive day filled with Yuletide joy.
How to cope with election day before you can start drinking heavily
ARE you suffering through work sober until you can start drinking to cope with the tension of waiting for the election result? Here’s how to deal with it.
Things to put on your Christmas wish list in case the Tories win
DO you need regular medicine from the NHS? If the Tories win it might be a good idea to ask for a chemistry set to make it yourself. Here are some other gift ideas.
Britain to leave EU because of massive, blond-haired child
BRITAIN will quit the European Union because a massive, blond-haired child says so.
Let's all vote for twats
THE UK has woken up and grimly set out to do its democratic duty by voting for an irredeemable f**king twat.
Nostalgic nation looks back on nine great years under the Tories
BRITAIN is today remembering all the cool things that have happened under Tory rule since 2010.
Elect me you little sh*ts
GOOD day. My message to you, on the final day before the general election, is stop buggering around and vote for me, you little sh*ts.
On reflection we made a terrible mistake by standing for something
IN this election, nobody is in any doubt about what the Lib Dems stand for. And, on reflection, that was our fatal mistake.