Politics Headlines

Remainers absolutely loving Brexit now

REMAINERS have confessed that they are thoroughly enjoying the humiliating collapse of Brexit and cannot wait to see what happens next.

'What is 'Brexit'?' asks David Davis

BREXIT secretary David Davis has denied ever having heard the word ‘Brexit’ before and has asked somebody to explain it to him.

Impact assessments wouldn't have helped the dinosaurs, says David Davis

DAVID Davis has told MPs that dinosaurs did not demand an impact assessment for the meteor that wiped them out.

Ruth Davidson ordered to be more delusional

SCOTTISH Conservative leader Ruth Davidson has been ordered to drop her radical position of relative sanity and join her fellow Tories in madness.

Jeremy Corbyn last spotted at Laser Quest in Swindon

LABOUR’S elusive leader Jeremy Corbyn has been located playing Laser Quest in Swindon.

You wouldn't like being socially mobile, says government

PEOPLE just become confused and upset if they rise above their existing social class, the government has claimed.

David Davis pays £50m to get out of gym contract

BREXIT secretary David Davis has happily paid over £50 million to cancel his contract at Fitness First.

Jacob Rees-Mogg 'viewed lithographs of Victorian ladies' ankles'

JACOB Rees-Mogg perused lithographs showing the bare ankles of Victorian strumpets in his constituency office, it has been claimed.

Britain reluctantly defends May against insane fascist

THE nation has reluctantly come to the defence of Theresa May after she was attacked for totally unfair reasons for once.

It took six months and a lot of work but we’ve caved completely, says David Davis

BREXIT minister David Davis has proudly told Britain that after six months of tough negotiating he has given in to every single one of the EU’s demands. 

Trump 'Pocahontas' comment part of move towards family-friendly racial slurs

PRESIDENT Trump’s latest racial slur is part of a White House strategy to make his offensive comments more accessible to the whole family.

Social media 'distorts truth' says man who used bus covered in lies

SOCIAL media 'distorts' the truth, according to a man who duped millions of people with a big red bus covered in deliberate lies.