Warhammer more than just a hobby, says Miliband

FANTASY battle game Warhammer is a serious military simulation, according to Labour leader Ed Miliband.

He could defend this country from a troll attack

Recent revelations about David Cameron’s ‘chillaxing’ weekends have sparked debate about whether politicians should have enough spare time for leisure pursuits.

But although Ed Miliband is a regular Saturday fixture at his local Games Workshop, when he can be seen painting tiny metal balrogs with a group of small boys, he claims Warhammer is not a hobby.

He said: “It’s quite the opposite of ‘chillaxing’ – rather it is a military simulation of the type practiced by great leaders since Roman times.

“I don’t even enjoy it, I do it from a sense of responsibility.

“For example last week I confronted the moral complexities associated with weapons of mass destruction when I used a siege catapult on some elves.

“The fantasy context does not appeal to me especially. The game could represent any theatre of war – Afghanistan, Iraq, Iran – it just happens to be populated by highly detailed miniature orcs with hand-painted banners.

“Obviously though if my mighty chaotic orc battalion causes a puny elf army to rout and flee there’s a certain frisson, I won’t deny it.”

He added: “I also sometimes attend steam fairs in a work context, because it’s important to connect with voters who might otherwise be mistaken for paedophiles.”