News

Man wearing chinos must not be aware there are other kinds of trousers

A MAN wearing chinos must somehow be unaware of all the other kinds of trousers in the world, it has been claimed.

You haven't even seen the episode where she kills Thatcher yet, say Doctor Who producers

DOCTOR Who producers cannot understand why critics are calling the show ‘too politically correct’ when the episode where she kills Thatcher has yet to screen.

Woman knocking back gin advent calendar at desk every morning

AN office worker with a gin advent calendar is knocking back the contents at 9am every day, colleagues have confirmed.

Man thought parents were getting up to leave, but they were just making more tea

A MAN has stared into the abyss after believing his parents were finally leaving only for them to begin making another pot of tea.

Student prepared to find out just how 'unconditional' university offer is

A STUDENT offered an 'unconditional' place at university is determined to test just how unconditional it really is, she has confirmed.

Kid who screamed for two hours because he didn't want the blue cup resents implication he's tired

A BOY who lost his shit because his mum gave him juice in the blue cup and not the green cup claims he is not in the slightest bit tired.

'What's the worst that can happen?' says owner of boa constrictor

THE owner of an 11ft long killer snake can not foresee any situation where his beloved pet causes him or anyone else any problems.

Boyfriend has six pairs of Nike Air Max and two pairs of underpants

A MAN who has six pairs of Nike Air Max trainers has only two pairs of underpants, his girlfriend has confirmed.