Thank god all our life stress is over forever, say A-Level students

NAIVE young people across the UK are thankful they are now permanently free from stress because their A-Levels are over.

Woman who knows she has no money still shocked when card is declined

A WOMAN who was aware her bank account was empty was still somehow shocked when her card was rejected.

Which painfully middle-class holiday are you booking?

ARE you planning a holiday that really establishes your middle-class credentials? Read our guide to the most pretentious breaks.  

Boss arrives in office wearing waistcoat

A BOSS has arrived in the office wearing a light blue shirt, a blue waistcoat and no jacket, and is gathering everyone for a talk. 

Primary teacher finally admits her job is easy

A PRIMARY teacher has finally stopped telling people how 'stressful' teaching is.

Hard-up estate agents forced to live in cosy, characterful properties

THE slowdown in the property market has forced estate agents to move to properties they would describe as 'cosy and with bags of charm'.

Prick from school now describing himself as an 'influencer'

THE worst prick from your school is now publicly calling himself an ‘influencer’, it has emerged.

Man with booze on display thinks he is cool

A MAN who has lined up some bottles of spirits in his kitchen thinks he is like a famous debauched singer from the 50s.