News

Boss taking credit for team's work only contributed management bullshit

A BOSS has taken all the credit for his team’s work despite mostly just distracting them with management toss.

Man desperately in need of a real man about the house

A MAN has decided he needs a real man to come and live with him to make up for his shortcomings as a male.

Waitrose closing stores because you're not good enough for them

WAITROSE is closing stores across the UK because Britons are not the ‘quality people’ they need in their shops.

Britain braced for 'shit tattoo-wave'

THE continuing heatwave will be forcing Britons to look at shit tattoos for the rest of the week and into the weekend.

The A-Level student's guide to being a wanker all summer

WITH A-levels coming to an end, you’ve suddenly got loads of time on your hands for self-absorbed teenage crap! Here are some ideas for activities.

Intern adds 'procuring and distributing varied, challenging ice-cream order' to CV

AN intern at a London office is turning her menial role bringing everyone ice-cream into proof that she is a dynamic self-starter.

Smug loved-up couple people not so f**king snuggly in heatwave

A SMUG loved-up couple aren’t looking so pleased with themselves in this week’s heatwave.

Everyone secretly wishing they were watching telly with the curtains shut

PEOPLE pretending to enjoy the sun by playing Frisbee and having barbecues would much rather be indoors watching Poldark, it has emerged.