Sport Headlines

Leicester fans attempting to boo Ranieri
LEICESTER City supporters are physically unable to jeer Claudio Ranieri, however bad results get.

Rugby fan claims there is rugby on
A RUGBY fan has insisted that a big rugby event is currently taking place, despite nobody having heard anything about it.

Wenger and Corbyn to swap jobs
ARSENAL manager Arsene Wenger and Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn are to trade roles in a bid to transform the fortunes of their respective teams.

Moyes urged to tone down utter contempt for Sunderland
DAVID Moyes has been urged to tone down his palpable disdain for Sunderland Football Club.

Southgate enjoys best moment of reign as England manager
GARETH Southgate has enjoyed what he will later agree was the happiest day of his stint as England manager.

Mourinho claims Old Trafford is haunted
JOSE Mourinho has blamed his team’s poor home form on a vengeful ghost.

Chelsea supporters to retire Gerrard chant in 2019
FANS of Chelsea have announced they will retire a song mocking Steven Gerrard at the end of the 2018-19 season.

Shattered Britain pins hopes on Man United getting beaten
HOPES are high that Manchester United can restore the nation’s morale by losing heavily against Arsenal this weekend.

England players controversially allowed to wear three lions
FIFA has turned down a request to stop the England team disrespecting the England crest by wearing it.

Mourinho downgraded to Adequate One
JOSE Mourinho has been reclassified as the Adequate One to reflect with his recent coaching CV.

I thought I was joining Man City, admits Pogba
PAUL Pogba thought he was joining Man City but didn't want to make a fuss by mentioning it before, it has emerged.

Gary Neville refusing to come down from Old Trafford roof
GARY Neville has been sat on the roof of Old Trafford since midnight, police have confirmed.