WORRIED fans have been reassured that pre-season fixtures are already under way, saving them from interacting with any other aspect of society.
THE Wimbledon Tennis Championship concluded on Wednesday but nobody noticed, officials have confirmed.
SAM Allardyce has been ruled out as England manager because he would actually like to do the job, the FA has confirmed.
WALES’ plucky performance in the semi-final of Euro 16 has reminded England fans that their team was not even remotely plucky.
ENGLAND'S footballers have vowed to redouble their crippling performance anxiety as they look ahead to the World Cup in Russia.
A MAN who has been keen to stress his 'Welshness' does not know a single word of the country’s national anthem, his friends have confirmed.
ANDY Murray continues his one-man campaign to make office life more bearable with an afternoon game against Jo-Wilfried Tsonga.
WALES made it to the Euro 16 semi-finals because of a plucky underdog mentality and the fact they are very good footballers, experts have claimed.
ROY Hodgson has been honoured by the Chartered Institute of Dominatrixes for his work in the field of humiliation.
THE debate over whether Leicester’s Jamie Vardy should start on the left of a three-man attack has left the nation sharply divided.
PORTUGAL'S Cristiano Ronaldo has accused a goalpost of ruining a game with its petty mentality.
UEFA is threatening to bring in emergency beard regulations after a reckless and dangerous outbreak of facial hair growth at Euro 2016.