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Environment

Britain closer to achieving goal of no water without shit in it

Porn mags in bushes and other areas of British nature in crisis

ADULT magazines used to be a common sight in Britain’s bushes, but they’re just one part of the country’s nature that is in crisis. Along with these.  

Workmate who saw Northern Lights putting on astounding display of smugness

YOUR colleague who witnessed the Aurora Borealis at the weekend is treating everyone to a once-in-a-lifetime display of smugness, it has emerged.

Britain's photographers in tireless quest for clichéd hot weather pictures

'It's a lovely sunny day here,' says someone 300 miles away as if that's surprising

A COLLEAGUE 300 miles away in an entirely different part of Britain has expressed surprise that the weather is different there.

Humanity to stick with oil

HUMANS are to continue to base their civilisation on a highly toxic substance destroying the climate that is largely controlled by lunatics.

How to watch the solar eclipse in the UK

We ask you: how are you celebrating raw sewage spills doubling in a year?

BRITAIN’S water companies have spilled record amounts of raw sewage into our rivers and seas, proving the doubters wrong. How are you thanking them?

We ask you: has the closure of five miles of the M25 hit you hard?

FOR 57 whole hours an entire junction of the M25 has closed. Why must London always be the one that suffers?

City meadow blooms with first used condom of spring

AN area of idyllic urban parkland has bloomed with spring’s first latex sign of illicit outdoor sex, it has emerged.