Documentary channels drop factual subjects

05-07-12

SATELLITE documentary channels have decided to drop factual programming to focus on UFOs, Bigfoot and Atlantis.

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After the Animal Channel showed mocked-up footage of mermaids which many viewers believed was real, programme makers are to ignore any distinction between facts and bollocks.

New ‘ficumentary’ shows include The Werewolves of Henry VIII, Stalin’s Mission to Mars and Anne Frank: Android Assassin.

Tom Logan, head of programming at The Factual Channel, said: “Our viewers don’t understand the difference between real events and speculative twaddle claiming Nostradamus shot JFK.

“Also real life can be extremely depressing, which is why I have just cancelled Holocaust: The Ultimate Inhumanity and replaced it with Auschwitz: Secret Nazi UFO Factory?

“Some would say this is an unethical approach to documentary-making, but as any scientist would tell you, you can’t prove the Mothman doesn’t exist.”

Documentary channel viewer Stephen Malley said: “The documentary channels have such a blatant disregard for the truth I’m starting to wonder if Dracula really existed.

“On the other hand, my encyclopaedic knowledge of alien conspiracies does makes me feel quite important.”

Fellow viewer Nikki Hollis said: “These sorts of documentaries are just harmless entertainment. Everyone knows 9/11 didn’t really happen, but it’s still fun to watch.”

TV insiders are currently predicting record viewing figures for the new Discovery Channel documentary Secret Prophecies of the Ancient Mayan UFO Astronauts of the SS Illuminati of Atlantis.

 

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