STRANDED lorry drivers in Kent have broken records for the level of violent racism in their conversations.
JEREMY Clarkson’s new Amazon contract includes an obligation to deliver 300 parcels a month.
COMMUTING from the Sea of Tranquility is now cheaper than renting a studio flat in Camden.
REVENUE & Customs has warned that all summer romances must begin by midnight.
EDGBASTON will stay open until 7pm today so England cricket fans can get mortal.
BOLLOCKINGLAND in Kent is the first theme park just for angry parents who want to publicly tell off their children.
A FLOTILLA of brave of volunteers will sail to Calais and then sail back with no migrants on board.
WEST End theatre goers have complained after a man watched Apocalypse Now on a 42 inch plasma TV during a performance of Harold Pinter’s The Caretaker.
SNIFFER dogs drafted in to tackle the Channel Tunnel migrant chaos are worried they are being ‘stitched up’ by David Cameron.