LEWIS Hamilton has been recognised as the country’s number one Lewis of all time.
STEAMPUNKS have won their battle for free quasi-Victorian corrective eyewear.
MILLIONS of Britons secretly enjoy Christmas and are actively looking forward to it.
THE shady figure who sold Myleene Klass a Catford garage for £2 million is refusing to discuss the deal.
THE Rochester house covered in England flags is a Marxist commune, it has emerged.
JAMES Dyson has been told to shut up and invent a toaster that is not a useless bag of piss.
A MAN in his thirties has expressed dismay at having to pretend to like 90s shoegaze band Ride for the second time.
WIGAN Athletic owner Dave Whelan is to reach out to his many Jewish friends with a lavish pork banquet.
A GOOD-LOOKING woman from a nice family has inexplicably failed to produce a cookery book.