THE BBC has confirmed that Top Gear will continue without Jeremy Clarkson as Britain is awash with boorish oafs.
LONDON hotel The Savoy has closed its doors after more than 125 years following a one-star TripAdvisor review.
THE Duchess of Cambridge has been advised that interest in her forthcoming baby is hovering around zero.
LEADING punk scientists have confirmed the existence of a fourth chord.
AFTER decades of women being described as being ‘pear-shaped’ and similar, men have been given their own contrived body shapes.
ZAYN Malik’s core fanbase of men working in the building trade is today in shock.
THE UK government has been overthrown by a liberal elite junta headed by Guardian columnist Polly Toynbee.
SHOWING initiative is a waste of time for the person who does it and those who have to live with the consequences.
JEREMY Paxman drew dozens of crude sketches of what he would do to David Cameron and Ed Miliband during last night’s TV interviews.