NUTRITIONISTS have claimed eating two, four, six, or eight portions of fruit and vegetables every day is healthy, but eating one, three, five, or seven could be fatal.
TEENAGERS have declared themselves privileged to live in the golden age of music represented by flame-haired genius Ed Sheeran.
JEREMY Corbyn had admitted that Labour’s Copeland loss means they can no longer ignore the serious flaws of Britain’s electorate.
LEICESTER City’s owners have sacked title-winning manager Claudio Ranieri, the fans of the club and the city of Leicester itself.
UKIP have responded to the Stoke by-election defeat by saying they do not need MPs because everyone does what they want anyway.
THE White House has confirmed that President Donald Trump is on glue.
A NEW BBC Scotland channel will show English period dramas with voiceovers from Scottish people calling everyone ‘bawbags’.
THE Guardian has published a guide to cooking quick, but delicious crystal meth for a casual Friday night get-together.
PEOPLE who love starting fires and watching others run for their lives are the most upbeat about Brexit, it has emerged.