A MAN from Leeds came within a split second of putting a row of Xs at the bottom of a text message to a woman he likes.
BEING a member of ‘generation rent’ is far less interesting than being a punk, hippie or raver, renters have claimed.
A WOMAN on the train is just not pregnant enough to oblige fellow passengers to offer her a seat, it has emerged.
A MIDDLE-aged man has purchased the functional sweater he will wear repeatedly until death.
A GRANDMOTHER has revealed she much prefers spending time with her iPad than with her two grandchildren.
NEXT year’s EU referendum will offer voters the chance to relaunch the Second World War.
A MAN who made a point of drinking water in between each pint of beer did not impress anyone, it has been confirmed.
Of all the painters with 'van' in their name, the most gifted is unquestionably Van Morrison.
Aries (21 MAR-19 APRIL) With the nights starting to draw in, you'll be able to spend more and more time lurking in your neighbour's hedge undetected.