THE Church of England has managed to appoint a female bishop within half a century of humans setting foot on another world.
A SHORTAGE of snow in the Alps has cheered up thousands who love to see the middle classes spend money on going to see some rocks.
THE social stigma attached to daytime drinking sessions has been lifted for the festive season.
PRIVATELY operated drones are a sign that society has lost its mind, experts have confirmed.
CHILD abduction drama The Missing is a prequel to the next Narnia series, it has emerged.
THE media is to cease reporting football results that, like Chelsea beating Hull, are entirely expected by everyone.
THE most popular men’s Christmas presents, including books, music and computer games, no longer exist as physical things.
A MAN is being unfairly expected to do the job he is paid to do, it has emerged.
DOZENS have been killed since the outbreak of a vicious battle between Britain’s leading quite posh crime families.