A GROWN man has announced that he will be having nothing more than a plate of chips for his dinner tonight.
A LOVING son spent an entire morning googling coupon codes to get money off a bunch of flowers for his mum, it has emerged.
THE DAILY Mail is scurrying around like a spider trying to get up society's trouser leg, it has emerged.
LONDON is today in the grip of normality, with millions having their breakfast then going to work.
A FATHER attempting to get his daughters into Catholic school told the admissions board that the Pope is 'fucking ace'.
ALL THE mothers at the school gate are horrendously competitive about their children’s progress, according to a mother who can think of nothing else.
THE average British pension will now fund one proper night out when you finally reach retirement, financial advisers have confirmed.
A LUCKY bastard of a schoolkid has got art this morning, then drama and then he's got history after lunch.
THE first class sections of regional trains do not feature the opulent luxury and fine dining experiences of the Orient Express, a man has found.