STRANDED lorry drivers in Kent have broken records for the level of violent racism in their conversations.
JEREMY Clarkson’s new Amazon contract includes an obligation to deliver 300 parcels a month.
COMMUTING from the Sea of Tranquility is now cheaper than renting a studio flat in Camden.
THE US dentist who killed Cecil the lion has said he would not knowingly have targeted an animal with a name.
REVENUE & Customs has warned that all summer romances must begin by midnight.
EDGBASTON will stay open until 7pm today so England cricket fans can get mortal.
SEAGULLS have cemented their position as humanity’s arch-enemy by opening a lettings agency specialising in ‘luxury studio flats’.
BOLLOCKINGLAND in Kent is the first theme park just for angry parents who want to publicly tell off their children.
A FLOTILLA of brave of volunteers will sail to Calais and then sail back with no migrants on board.