DAVID Cameron and Ed Miliband have confirmed that one of them is going to be prime minister in a few weeks.
PEOPLE with big letters strewn around their homes are illiterate morons, it has been confirmed.
BRITONS lost what would have been their greatest hour over the weekend.
ACTIVIST and author Naomi Klein’s hair looks too good, it has been claimed.
AS Britain prepares to spend £300 million on chocolate, experts have confirmed that chips are still far better.
FORMER X Factor host Dermot O’Leary was shown clips of his time on the show before being dropped into Simon Cowell’s carnivore pit.
NIGEL Farage has revealed the original version of his new book was about African-American lesbians.
THE BBC has confirmed that Top Gear will continue without Jeremy Clarkson as Britain is awash with boorish oafs.
LONDON hotel The Savoy has closed its doors after more than 125 years following a one-star TripAdvisor review.