A HUGE cat has responded to attempts to evict it from a garden with cold indifference.
A 27-YEAR-OLD man has won the World Punching Competition.
BRITISH tennis fans have run amok after the Davis Cup, downing jugs of winter Pimms and demanding plate after plate of olives.
RECORD numbers of Britons are passionately pretending to have marched against climate change.
FORMER minister Grant Shapps is being forced to earn a living with his own get-rich-quick schemes.
SCOTLAND is taking the day off to worship its water dinosaur, it has emerged.
ALL the alcohol that was being saved for Christmas has already been drunk.
A SIX-YEAR-OLD is being read the Old Testament as a fairy story by her proudly atheist father.
AN office poser has taken to wearing a scarf throughout the working day, not just when outside.