A COUPLE have decided to just leave their kitchen as it is.
WORN-DOWN parents have purchased a cigarette-smoking monkey as their young son’s Christmas present.
A 27-YEAR-OLD man has won the World Punching Competition.
A HUGE cat has responded to attempts to evict it from a garden with cold indifference.
BRITISH tennis fans have run amok after the Davis Cup, downing jugs of winter Pimms and demanding plate after plate of olives.
RECORD numbers of Britons are passionately pretending to have marched against climate change.
FORMER minister Grant Shapps is being forced to earn a living with his own get-rich-quick schemes.
SCOTLAND is taking the day off to worship its water dinosaur, it has emerged.
ALL the alcohol that was being saved for Christmas has already been drunk.