A SWINDON man has celebrated the end of his twenties by accepting that none of his childhood ambitions will ever come to pass.
GIRAFFES have confirmed that they are fuelled by hate and plan to exterminate the human race.
A WOMAN has found herself torn over whether to pinpoint the specific slice of cake that she would like.
HOUSES are now worth so much they do not want people living in them and lowering their tone, they have announced.
DAILY Mail columnist Richard Littlejohn is in a sadomasochistic master-slave relationship with his binmen, he has admitted.
LIBOR rigger Tom Hayes is to tunnel out of prison using a poster of Margaret Thatcher as cover.
Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG) Given that the Fire Brigade puts out fires, surely the PC Brigade would put out political correctness?
A CAT has realised that it can beat up any other cat by cutting out the preliminary staring.
THIS whole Jeremy Corbyn thing is really happening, it has emerged.