Cameron reminds everyone it’s an election campaign as he unveils massive lie

DAVID Cameron has urged Britain to get into the spirit of the general election instead of accusing him of lying.

Range Rover unveils most depressing vehicle in history

THE very existence of a new £150k Range Rover is enough to make you want to kill yourself, it has been claimed.

Competent cook convinced he is a fancy chef

A MAN has been deceived into thinking he is a professional chef by food websites and celebrity cookbooks.

Only reason to drop litter is that you're a selfish dick, say experts

SCIENTISTS have been unable to identify a single worthwhile reason for dropping litter.

Lots of cake left over at Piers Morgan’s 50th

MOST of the food at Piers Morgan’s 50th birthday party remained uneaten, it has been confirmed.

Cameron and Miliband set out horrible, soul-destroying choice

DAVID Cameron and Ed Miliband have confirmed that one of them is going to be prime minister in a few weeks.

People who like big decorative letters cannot even read

PEOPLE with big letters strewn around their homes are illiterate morons, it has been confirmed.

Lost hour would have been incredible

BRITONS lost what would have been their greatest hour over the weekend.

Naomi Klein’s great hair detracting from serious message

ACTIVIST and author Naomi Klein’s hair looks too good, it has been claimed.