APPLE design guru Sir Jonathan Ive has admitted his iconic designs are based on his inability to draw anything except oblongs.
'GOING to the carvery' is now the UK’s biggest belief system.
BRITAIN’S coastal waters are being invaded by sea-dwelling creatures.
A GAY Irish man who can now legally wed his partner is desperate not to.
NORWICH City owner Delia Smith has turned down the club's promotion, insisting the Premier League is too fancy.
KENT residents have said they may never trust the earth again after being hit by a 4.2 magnitude earthquake.
LABOUR leadership hopeful Liz Kendall has promised to punch the last surviving British coal miner hard in the face.
THE British public have been warned that watching the Eurovision Song Contest to sneer at it is no better than watching it genuinely, like a Belgian.
OSAMA bin Laden was convinced that the CIA were responsible for the 9/11 attacks despite planning them himself, it has emerged.