Men in balaclavas offer soothing prospect of war
MEN wearing balaclavas have been making a dreadful situation better.
Idea of female cub scout leader 'is doing Al Qaeda's head in'
JIHADISTS said the idea of a woman being in charge of young males in uniform was driving them crazy.
Britain to be physically removed from Europe
BRITAIN is to be detached from the Earth's crust and moved away from Europe.
New Xbox will revolutionise sitting on your fat arse
MICROSOFT'S Xbox One heralds the dawn of a new era in sitting on your fat lazy backside.
Motorists and cyclists unite against pedestrians
CAR and bike owners have agreed that they hate people who travel on foot.
Doctors' receptionists urged to be less terrifying
PATIENTS have asked doctors' receptionists if they can please stop looking at them like that.
Gay marriage will affect things that don't matter, reveals Tebbit
GAY marriage could force Britain to read about a newly married lesbian queen opening a hospital, it has emerged.
Apple fans queue overnight for tax avoidance scheme
APPLE'S diehard fans are queuing outside the company's stores eager to snap-up the latest beautifully designed way of avoiding tax.
Retired footballers start tropical detective agency
FORMER Premier League players have joined forces to fight crime in exotic locations.
