THE PUBLIC has been warned not to approach men wearing Barcelona shirts who clearly have no ethnic affiliation to the Catalan region.
THE inventor of the internet has said that it must remain free of government interference and have more videos with bulldogs in.
LONDON tube drivers have admitted that the game may be up.
EVERYONE who has ever been thrown out of a nightclub has confirmed it was not their fault.
MILK alternatives made from soya, quinoa and flax are best suited to special people, it has been confirmed.
COUNCILS have started plunging unemployed people in rivers to see if they float, it has been confirmed.
SUNDERLAND manager Gus Poyet has hit out at journalists hitting out at him.
WALES is in turmoil after being beaten at rugby by a country that is indifferent to the sport.
MILLIONS are running until their legs give out just for something to do.