Society
Britain to be physically removed from Europe
BRITAIN is to be detached from the Earth's crust and moved away from Europe.
Motorists and cyclists unite against pedestrians
CAR and bike owners have agreed that they hate people who travel on foot.
Gay marriage will affect things that don't matter, reveals Tebbit
GAY marriage could force Britain to read about a newly married lesbian queen opening a hospital, it has emerged.
Gay people to continue having lots of hot sex
BRITAIN'S gay men and women have defied angry Tories by taking their gayness to a new and hotter level.
Warn young children about Daily Mail sidebar, say experts
CHILDREN should be warned about Femail Today as soon they have access to the internet, it has been claimed.
Male aggression caused by chafing
STOCKY men are aggressive because their clothes are constantly chafing.
Older workers kept alive by hate
PEOPLE who don't retire live longer because they are fuelled by hatred for their co-workers.