Society

Man unveils plan to burn the crap out of a pizza at 3am 


A MAN has announced he will be arriving home drunk around three in the morning and then burning the shit out of a frozen pizza.

16-year-old fools barman by ordering a Campari and soda

A 16-YEAR-OLD girl managed to fool bar staff that she was of legal drinking age by ordering a Campari and soda.

Dumped man wondering if ‘too nice’ might mean something else

A RECENTLY-DUMPED man is not sure why being ‘too nice’ was such a problem.

Classic car owner dreaming of soulless, reliable modern car

THE owner of a character-filled 1960s car is desperate for one that is comfortable and does not constantly break down, he has revealed.

Man’s back-up career as unrealistic as dream career

AN ASPIRING musician has discovered that his fall-back career option of setting up a world-renowned record label is only marginally less impossible.

Friends make sure to get group photo of awful night out

AN AWFUL, depressing evening out has been immortalised in a cheerful group photo.

Can we do hanging next? asks Britain

BRITONS have demanded another important issue to vote on without much thought for the consequences.

Neighbourhood traumatised by uncovered knees

LOCALS are coming to terms with having seen their neighbour's weird knees over the weekend.