A PROFESSOR has entered into a wager that he can make a Scottish National Party MP pass for a gentleman.
DAVID Cameron has confirmed it is okay to steal stuff from foreigners.
OFSTED School Performance Tables will culminate in play-offs and a Wembley Final.
THE public has been warned to avoid rail travel on any date.
A GAY wedding cake has turned some bread rolls gay after being left beside them on a bakery counter.
15-YEAR-OLD Stephen Malley was asked to sit at the Trident missile controls and not press anything, it has emerged.
HOMEWORKERS in need of office-style conversation about TV and sport are meeting by dog waste bins.
STUDENTS hoping to move on to higher education from the University of Life must now pay a four-figure annual sum.