Society

ARE you full of the joys of the season, mince pies and festive-themed ales, or are you a vicious miser who deserves a good triple haunting?

TRAINS are so unreliable they have to come up with a host of stupid excuses to keep travellers docile. Here’s the truth behind their lies.

PETA have claimed a pub called ‘The Sly Old Fox’ is offensive to foxes. Which is a great way to stop people taking you seriously and presumably means these names are unacceptable too…

ENTERED a room? Concerned not everyone in it know you were born with coal in the bath and hatred of Thatcher in your heart? Let them know.

A MAN attending a reunion of his school class is shocked to see how badly all his former classmates have aged in the last 25 years.

THE Charity Commission admitted it is outside the scope of its enquiry, but that flying a centenarian long-haul while Covid was rampant was ‘some f**king bullshit.’

HANNAH Ingram-Moore has set up a charity to help innocent victims of buying Captain Tom cash-grab books filled with mawkish life lessons.

A MAN has told his wife he can no longer sustain an erection because of a prolonged period of driving below 20mph.