NOBODY has starved to death so far despite a desperate lack of courgettes reaching British shores.
HEAVY snow or hardly any snow are both a great excuses for a massive whine, the UK population has confirmed.
A LOBSTER is dismayed to have ended up in the frozen food section of Lidl, he has confirmed.
THE Met Office has thanked your dad for keeping people up-to-date with the weather via Facebook.
SCOTLAND is preparing to experience bad weather for the first time in its history.
MANY sheep have extreme political views, it has emerged.
A CAT is acting tough because of being outside.
A RAT that is 'the size of a normal rat' has been sighted.