Steve Davis to make prog rock sexy again

LITHE snooker legend Steve Davis’s new BBC radio show is going to put the sexy back into progressive rock music, it was claimed last night.

Steve loves how baize feels

Executives at BBC Radio 6 believe Davis’s new weekly show The Steven Davis Progressive Rock and Concept-Driven Melodic Rock Hour will bring a much-needed female audience to a genre often perceived as ‘uncool’.

A spokesman for the station said: “We’re taking a style of music commonly identified with unmarried male IT professionals of a certain age and flipping the script with an injection of raw flame-haired sexuality.

“Anyone with a womb will know that snake-hipped Steve is so hot he could make their radio pregnant. Such is his smoulder factor that he even looks like a lit cigarette.”

Steve Davis, whose impressive sexual track record permits him to refer to himself in the third person, said: “Steve Davis has two loves in life – ladies and progressive rock.

“Snooker is just a lucrative hobby that allows him to sup more deeply from those two metaphorical goblets of pleasure, without having to worry about his mortgage.

“While not wishing to stray into the terrain of vulgarity, Steve knows from experience that rock music with interesting time signatures, flutes and Michael Moorcock references stimulates certain zones of the female body in interesting and beautiful ways.

“This is especially true of the very obscure German mono pressing of Magma’s self-titled debut album. Which Steve just happens to have in his extensive collection.”

BBC Radio 6’s newly-unveiled summer schedule also features Ray Reardon’s Minimal Techno Dimension and Folk Forest with Ronnie O’Sullivan.