I Can Do A Terrible Scottish Accent Too, Says Laurie

HUGH Laurie has appealed to British casting directors insisting he can do regional accents that are ‘every bit as dreadful’ as the American one which has earned him millions of dollars. 

'Two fat-assed ladies'

Since moving to the US the former Englishman has become a household name, starring in the gritty drama House! as the brilliant but edgy bingo caller, Donovan House.

With his trademark walking stick, House limps between the tables, swallowing handfuls of prescription pain killers and telling the frightened customers why bingo is a ‘cruel mistress’.

The star of Stuart Little and Stuart Little 2, said: “I would love to play a really meaty British character, as long as they don’t mind me sounding like a posh Englishman with a speech impediment.

“I can do your classic Highlander: ‘Och, will ye no be havin’ a wee dram of whisky with yer porridge the noo’.

“Or perhaps a terribly violent Glaswegian type: ‘See ye ya bastart, I’ll kick ye right in the baws’.

“Or what about a Geordie builder?: ‘Way aye man, that’s a canny bit o’ bait. Can I put it in me stottie?’.”

He added: “Of course, my Welshman is legendary: ‘Now then, Dai bach, can I be having sexual intercourse with your prize ram?’.”