Singleton Dares To Challenge Urban Myth

FORMER Blue Peter presenter Valerie Singleton was under attack last night after insisting she was not a raving lesbian.

What the fuck was wrong with John Noakes?

Singleton revealed she had done it with lots of men in a variety of hot, sexy positions, but had never even been tempted to lesbian anyone.

Tom Logan, Liberal Democrat MP for North Bristol, said: "This is an outrage.

"I have been sustained for many years by the thought of Valerie Singleton and Lesley Judd going at it like a couple of crazy lesbian cave women. Sometimes there was Angel Delight involved."

Backbench MPs are now calling for an urgent review of urban myths including the Richard Gere one, the Jamie Lee Curtis one, and the one about the newsreader who had a bust of Queen Victoria stuck up his back passage.

Singleton said last night: "I have never done it with Moira Stewart, I have never done it with Angela Rippon and I have never done it with Virginia Wade.

"I have, however, done it with Peter Purves. It was extremely mucky. He liked it when I applied sticky-back plastic to his big hairy bum and then ripped it off. Petra must have thought I was trying to kill him."

But Singleton also rejected accusations she was now the dirtiest of all the Blue Peter presenters, insisting she was probably dirtier than Peter Duncan, but nowhere near as dirty as Anthea Turner.