Health

'Instead of paracetamol, pregnant women should light up a soothing cigarette'

PREGNANT women in the US have been advised that instead of taking dangerous, untested paracetamol, they should turn to harmless tobacco.

Outbreaks of lucidity on Tuesday: Your period as a weather report

GOOD evening, I’m Carol Kirkwood, and this is the rundown of a forbidding menstrual week ahead. Here’s the forecast.

Seven easy steps to uprooting your life and moving to a better NHS trust

NHS TRUST league tables have been published, so it’s never been easier to change your location to get the best medical care. Here’s what you should do.

'I stopped being a fat bastard': My gripping Mounjaro story, by every newspaper

YOU will not believe what happened when I took a popular weight-loss drug noted for its effectiveness and the vast body of clinical evidence proving it aids weight loss!

'Covid made me get a D in psychology': Pandemic excuses that are wearing a bit thin now

TEENAGERS have apparently ‘bounced back’ from Covid with better exam results. But is it perhaps time for them - and plenty of older people - to get over a pandemic that ended in early 2021?

Record numbers in denial about British seaside

THOUSANDS of Britons are in deep denial about the true nature of the seaside areas they are flocking to in the hot weather.

Fat anti-vaxxer can't wait to take Mounjaro

AN overweight sceptic of Covid vaccines is nevertheless excited to give the miracle NHS weight loss injection Mounjaro a go.

Man thinking of dying to spite striking doctors

A MAN is considering teaching striking doctors the error of their ways by dying in the next five days, he has announced.

How to stay annoyed during a heatwave

DURING heatwaves it’s important to take appropriate precautions during a heatwave so that you stay British and irritable, not relaxed like a foreigner. Remain peeved with this guide.