Jedi church split on ewok-wookiee marriage
LEADING Jedis are divided on marriage between different alien species, it has emerged.
As Jedi weddings in the UK on Earth became a possibility, intergalactic experts warned that Endor is in the grip of a political shit-storm.
Supreme commander of the galactic senate, Martin Bishop, said: “Here in a galaxy far, far away, same-sex marriage between Jedis has been legal for centuries. Fine.
“But we just can’t get our heads round the logistics of wookiee-ewok unions. It’s like a massive spaniel boning a tiny bear. Very hard to say whether that’s ok.
“Also, imagine the state of the plughole afterwards.”
Members of the Presbyterian Ewok Church of Endor have described ewok-wookiee marriage as a “dangerous experiment” and marched on the capital with placards declaring ‘Wookiee sex is Sith!’
29-year-old ewok Julian Cook said “Me and my wookiee went to that rally and posed under the placard with our own placard which had ‘-SATIONAL!!!’ written on it. We are so awesome and cute together.”
Liberal stormtrooper Tom Logan said: “This isn’t Empire policy but personally I think it’s totally natural and all part of the Force. You can go about your business.”
He added: “Move along.”