Obama thanks Romney for being such a penis

PRESIDENT Barack Obama has thanked Mitt Romney for being a largely unappealing man.

Obama said: “It’s been a very rocky four years, and if my closest rival hadn’t been so evidently a big dog’s cock I’d have been toast.

“Mr Romney, I salute you for making this possible with your general lack of charm.

“I hope there’s plenty more Republicans like you in the future.”