Ministers Unveil Plans For 'Road' Between Edinburgh And Glasgow

20-06-07

SCOTLAND'S transport system is to be revolutionised with the construction of the first 'road' between Scotland's two major cities.

It's like something out of Star Trek

For years travellers have been forced to negotiate a series of farm tacks, tow paths and gravel tips.

But after extensive research the Scottish Executive has now approved plans for a futuristic 'road' or 'motorway'.

A Scottish Executive spokesman said: "We realised that other European countries have roads between major population centres and it seems to work very well."

The new 'road' will be constructed primarily of tarmac and will have white painted lines to differentiate between lanes.

The spokesman added: "There will be a low fence in the middle for safety reasons as some vehicles may now be able to reach speeds of 30 or even 35 miles per hour.

"We've gone for three lanes in each direction. We looked at having two lanes each way but soon realised that was completely and utterly insane."

But the Executive has also rejected calls for a floating 'bullet train' across the central belt. The spokesman said: "It looks good on paper but in reality it means sitting next to people from Falkirk."

Transport minister Stewart Stevenson said the new 'road' would help Scotland compete with its African rivals adding: "Meep, meep, meep. Meep, meep."

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