Crowdfund started to have Nigel Farage fired into the sun

27-12-16


OVER £100,000 has already been raised to strap Nigel Farage to a rocket bound for the centre of the sun.

Organisers of ‘Farage Fired Into The Sun’ have been inundated with offers from scientists and engineers to build the one-way craft for the frog-faced former UKIP leader.

Volunteer Nikki Hollis said: “Fundraising is simply a matter of showing people a photo of Nigel Farage and telling them that the sun’s surface is 5,500 degrees Celsius.

“I pull a shopping trolley around with me because as soon as I outline the effects of hot plasma on a Crombie coat people just hand over their change jars and the contents of their pockets.”

Hollis added: “I’ve dug wells in Malawi and built schools in Cambodia but nothing will give me a sense of achievement like watching Farage leave the Earth’s atmosphere.”

Donor Roy Hobbs said: “I nod hello to my Somalian neighbours and tip the driver when I get a curry delivered, but as a white person who isn’t a mad racist this is the best thing I can do to show I’m not a prick.”

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