Drinking alcohol 'is cheapest way to feel warm'

12-12-12

AS energy costs spiral, householders are relying on alcohol to get a warm feeling.

It’s very warm and tingly in here

Recent gas and electricity price rises have led millions to explore beer, wine and spirit consumption as an economical alternative to conventional heating.

Father-of-two Stephen Malley said: “I can’t afford to heat the house, but this bottle of Scotch gives me a warm inner glow.

“Even my nose is lovely and rosy. The kids like it too, it helps them sleep in a way that just having the radiators on didn’t.

Teacher Emma Bradford said: “My flat feels lovely and warm now I’ve had a lot of gin.

“In fact I might sleep outside on a park bench tonight, just for novelty value.

“The only downside of alcohol-based body heating seems to be that I am more argumentative and un-coordinated.”

Professor Henry Brubaker of the Institute for Studies said: “There is a subtle but important difference between feeling warm and being warm.

“Also we may start to see seasonal booze price increases as brewers moan about ‘dwindling North Sea alcohol reserves’.”

 

 

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