Easter eggs about a tenth the size you remember, confirm experts

14-04-17

MODERN Easter eggs are barely two disappointing mouthfuls, adults have confirmed.

After shamelessly raiding their children’s Easter egg stash, parents across Britain have reported a meagre haul of sickly chocolate.

Stephen Malley said: “When I was a kid you’d gorge on Easter eggs until you never wanted to eat chocolate again, but I might as well have not bothered breaking that egg open. I could’ve swallowed it whole.”

He added: “I’m starting to think the few seconds of satisfaction don’t justify having to pretend to my children that there was a break-in overnight.”

Chocolate economist Julian Cook said: “At their current rate of shrinkage, Easter eggs will be merely theoretical by 2025.

“You will simply be told that you’ve eaten one, probably via a text and then you’ll feel slightly nauseous and ashamed.”

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