Everyone thinking about trying khat

05-07-13

MILLIONS of Britons are considering giving khat a go after hearing about it for the first time this week.

They're in talks with Waitrose

They’re in talks with Waitrose

The newly-illegal plant that can be chewed to produce a stimulant effect, was discovered after Theresa May told them all about it.

Office worker Tom Logan said: “I don’t really like coffee so this sounds like the ideal thing for getting through those dull morning meetings.

“Presumably I will have to spit the masticated khat into a bin, but I guess it’s no worse than chewing gum. Probably it will make me look a bit like a cowboy.”

Team leader Nikki Hollis said: “As a busy career woman, I only get to hear about interesting new drugs when they are banned, or sometimes unbanned.

“I thought, why should Somali cab drivers have all the khat fun?

“So I just bought some and my first complaint is that it’s fucking massive, basically it’s a hedge.

“Still, it’s a fun cocaine alternative with a funky ethnic vibe.”

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