Exotic Japanese Girlfriend Wants Vauxhall Zafira

AROUND 63% of exotic Japanese girlfriends wear old socks in bed and insist their boyfriends buy a Vauxhall Zafira or Ford Focus C-Max, new research shows. 

The Zafira: Seven seats and 39 miles per gallon

Most will dress like schoolgirls in those incredibly sexy over the knee socks in their normal everyday life, but virtually none will keep the clothes on for bedroom sex fun.

Only three percent are skilled in Tantric sex or the arts of the Geisha, while all have vaginas which are virtually indistinguishable from those of western women.

Tom Logan, 35, a brand manager of Clerkenwell, London, said: "Obviously, I was curious. I’d heard they could do amazing things with their yin-yangs.

"It was nice being in there, don’t get me wrong, but if you blindfolded me and put me in a European one right after I’d be hard pressed to tell you which was which.”

Aya Kawasaki, Mr Logan’s ex-girlfriend, said she had been forced to finish with him because he insisted on keeping her used underwear in a vending machine in his hall.

She said: "Why can’t he put them through washing machine like is normal in Japan?

"He buy me set of ping pong balls and place pint glass at bottom of bed. What that about? I don’t even play tables tennis. I like watch Boston Legal and eat Milk Tray."