Facebook ‘Friends Day’ breeds nothing but renewed contempt

05-02-16

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FACEBOOK’S celebration of friendship has led to a surge in bitter hatred.

‘Friends Day’ placed a video on your wall designed to make you appreciate your ‘connections’, but instead reminded millions of people how few of their so called ‘friends’ even bother to wish them a happy birthday.

Martin Bishop, from Stevenage, said: “I counted three out of 357. Thank you, Zuckerberg, for that crushing reminder of my perceived self-worth, which is apparently less than one percent.

“So now I’m going to become a Scientologist.”

Eleanor Shaw, from Hatfield, added: “I was forced to look at a photo of me and my ‘friends’ yachting last year. I hated that trip and I’ve barely spoken to any of them since. Facebook needs to mind its own frigging business.”

Facebook has acknowledged the mistake of encouraging the people of the internet to appreciate each other.

A spokesman said: “Next year we’ll do ‘Look at My Fancy Holiday’. That should make you pricks happy.”

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