Men queue at florists for reluctant displays of undying love

MEN across Britain have begun their grim annual duty of buying flowers.

Florists have reported being swamped by long queues of forlorn, awkward-looking men clutching £10 notes.

Tom Logan said: “This is the day I dread most when I have to make a modest, thoughtful gesture for the woman I love more than life itself.

“I’d climb any mountain, cross every sea for my wife, but I do I really have to stand here for half an hour to pay a tenner for something that’s  already dead?”

Florist Emma Bradford said: “You can see the love in their eyes, mixing with a healthy amount of fear and resentment.

“I like to drag them around the whole shop looking at hyacinths and freesias just to make the most of my power.”