It was me that called them swivel-eyed loons, says Cameron

20-05-13

DAVID Cameron has admitted that he is the senior Tory who called activists ‘swivel-eyed loons’.

Holly was a bit frightened

Holly was a bit frightened

Confirming that he ‘hates every last fucking one of them’, the prime minister said he now wished he had chosen a different career.

Speaking to ITV’s This Morning, he said: “I actually called them ‘swivel-eyed motherfuckers with brains full of goat piss’.

“The Telegraph changed it to ‘loons’ because Telegraph readers are the sort of people who get terribly offended at the word ‘motherfuckers’.”

Grabbing Holly Willoughby by the wrist, he said: “You want to try sounding sympathetic while they spout their endless, shit-filled opinions about Europe and gay marriage.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m not some fanny-arsed liberal, but fuck me if these people haven’t escaped from somewhere.

“If I thought I could get away with it I’d push them off a fucking cliff.”

Looking into the camera, the prime minister continued: “Go and join UKIP then, you bunch of mouth-breathing dipshits. Try and out crazy each other until you fall to the ground, writhing and speaking in tongues like some mental, Southern Baptist weirdo.”

Cameron said he was now thinking about returning to his previous career of doing PR for a television company, insisting that ‘some of the programmes might be quite good’.

He added: “I really just wanted to be Tony Blair. Does that make me a bad person?”

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